TRUMP-PUTIN. IMALU LI ZA ORUŽJE DOZVOLU..
Iz samo vama poznatih razloga, poželjeli ste imati pištolj. Ili revolver. Ili samokres. Walther, Beretta, Mauser, Glock, Tetejac, Smith & Wesson, Magnum ili .. što ti ja znam. Samo zavirite u Njuškalo. I izaberite. Da, i ono najvažnije – morate imati dozvolu za držanje i nošenje oružja.
Jer treba vam pod hitno pištolj. Radi vlastite sigurnosti. Radi straha od čagljeva ili medvjeda. Radi opasnih susjeda, radi straha od momaka u fantomkama, od političkih neprijatelja, od supruginih ljubavnika i t.d. A sve to, radi nekog ratničkog atavizma u vama, radi gore navedenih bedastih razloga. Vi želite revolver i točka.
Međutim, oružje je zajebana stvari i za sobom povlači veliku odgovornost. Postupak dobivanja dozvole za nošenje oružja je strogo reguliran kako bi se osigurala sigurnost građana. A za to trebate proći trnovit put. Morate na liječnički pregled.
Pregledom za držanje i nošenje oružja utvrđuje se psihofizička sposobnost za rukovanje oružjem. Za pregled morate imati osobnu i zdravstvenu iskaznicu, potvrdu liječnika obiteljske medicine o zdravstvenom stanju, medicinsku dokumentaciju - nalaze svih mogućih specijalista medicine ako bolujete od nekih bolesti i pazi sada - naočale ili leće. I počinje, zakonom propisani cirkus.
Ispitivati će vam vid, obaviti dinamometriju odnosno izmjeriti mišićnu snagu !!!, testirati plućnu funkciju, izvaditi sve nalaze krvi i urina, obaviti EKG i na kraju, psihološki vas obraditi.
E tu će vam psiholog, kopati po vašoj moždanoj intimi, sve kako bi li saznao da li ste malo „čaknuti“, jeste li skloni nasilju, jeste li „alkić“, fali li daska u glavi, da li ševite redovito…….dobro, to baš ne ali i ovo je više nego dovoljno, da načisto popizdite i postanete šizofrenik. I da, da dodam. Za taj jebeni pištolj potrebno je prethodno odobrenje Ministarstva unutarnjih poslova. Za to se trebate obratiti policijskoj upravi ili postaji prema mjestu vašeg prebivališta.
A to nije sve. Među osnovnim uvjetima za nabavu oružja su: položeni lovački ispit ili aktivno natjecanje u sportskom streljaštvu, minimalna dob od 21 godine, nepostojanje kaznenih ili prekršajnih sankcija za određena djela te osigurani uvjeti za siguran smještaj i čuvanje oružja.
I ako do sada niste popizdili, smiješi vam se dozvola za pištolj da bi se konačno osjećali sigurni.
O tempora o mores.
S druge strane, na trećem planetu od Sunca, na plavom planetu Zemlji, žive dva lika, slobodno ih s punim pravom nazovite kako hoćete, kojima ne treba gnjavaža oko nekakvih dozvola. Bez da bi ih, u prvom redu psihijatri, proglasili normalnima, oni imaju pravo na moćno oružje, na apokalipsu, na armagedon, na uništavanje života. Oni, bez da su prošli svu pizdariju oko dozvola za oružje, drže svoj starački prst na crvenom dugmetu, pritiskom kojeg bi, „treći planet od Sunca“, i sve što na njemu živi, pretvorili u pustinju. U ovoj šahovskoj igri bez pobjednika, nema remija. Samo sveopći, šah-mat.
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Ne daj Bože da bude po onoj – zaželjeli ste, gledajte.
Jer neće biti nikoga, da bi mogao gledati.
„Zaustavite Zemlju, silazim“.
21. 1. 2026.
Nebojša Magdić
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